It turns out it’s really not a good idea to microwave your iPhone 5

Well, now, there’s a thing. Honestly, you think you’ve seen everything in this business, and then one day, a story like this pops up, and you realise that, in fact, you ain’t seen nothing yet. Well, assuming that the story really is completely genuine, and not one massive, massive hoax of course; it’s always possible that the entire thing is made up, and is designed to feed into people’s existing perceptions of iPhone owners. Assuming it is genuine, though, all I can say is, “Wait, what? Really?

Y’see, according to RocketNews, there’s been a spate of people in Japan buying an iPhone 5, and then going on to, erm, microwave it. Oh, it gets worse, believe me…

Y’see, they’re not just microwaving them as a prank, or anything like that. If people were buying an iPhone 5, and then blowing them up for a laugh, then I’d think it was a bit of expensive way to generate lulz, but at least I’d have understood it. Well that’s not why they’re doing it; no sirree, they’re doing it because someone on the internet said that you could charge the phone up by microwaving it for 20 seconds.

Yes, really…

Now, y’see, that’s the bit that makes me think this whole thing could just be one massive trolling, designed to provoke maximum lulz from everyone who thinks that iPhone fans really are that gullible. But then, part of me wants to be they are that gullible, which is why a story like this would be the perfect way to troll, well, people like me. So is it genuine? I don’t know, but it doesn’t really matter; if it’s true, it’s funny. If it’s not true, it’s an awesome trolling, and therefore, it’s funny.

It does also make me wonder how other phones might react if you microwave them. I reckon the Samsung Galaxy Note II would turn green and start smashing things, while the Sony Xperia T would develop radioactive breath, and ravage Tokyo.

Er, don’t try microwaving them, though, ‘cos that’d be silly…

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About TechnicalMarkus

It's a little known fact Technical Markus has now beaten both his Transformers addiction AND his Mass Effect addiction, by replacing both with an equally obsessive addiction to XCOM: Enemy Unknown and buying Humble Bundles for his Android phone. At the moment, he's pondering the actual usefulness of smartwatches and smart glasses, even if the nerd in him is shouting for joy at how sci-fi they are. He spends his spare time being whinged at to figure out what's wrong with other people's mobile phones, and drinking unimaginable quantities of tea. With milk. And three sweeteners, thanks for asking. Oh, and he's got an HTC One X, but he reckons his next phone might be a Sony, the turncoat...