Well folks, I wondered when this day would come. Ages upon ages ago (two-and-a-bit years ago, in fact), I did a blog post about the TwitterPeek, a thingie that was only tangentially related to the topic of mobile phones, ‘cos it was a handheld device designed only to do Twitter. There was also an email version, designed only to do emails, and at the time I said that, even as a concept, it was utterly, irredeemably pointless.

Well, the day has now come when I am proved right, according to Engadget, but it’s a shame that the death of this thing has also led to customers being shafted.

Allow me to explain/rant…

Basically, the Peek range of devices are being killed and there’ll be no replacements for them, ‘cos Peek have decided to switch over entirely to cloud-based software services. Peek’s CEO, Amol Sarva, had this to say:

“Unfortunately we cannot maintain the network forever for a few users, so that end time has come. The networks are changing standards, protocols etc and the old units are now end of life. We have lots going with rapid adoption of our software by phone brands around the world, so Peek is flat out building for a number of platforms that our OEM customers are deploying like Android and Mediatek. We are not offering a Peek-made device to replace these old ones.”

Changing network standards? I don’t believe that for a second. I mean come on, it’s just a case of having a data connection, and it doesn’t even need 3G, so unless the networks are dumping every 2G bit of their infrastructure, that’s a load of cobblers. But here’s the thing, right: with the death of their handheld range, the service is also being thrown in the bin.

Including the “lifetime” service that customers paid $299 for…

Yeah, well done Peek, you just shafted everyone who trusted you enough to buy one of your devices. Or who were daft enough to fall for your marketing, and believe that your Peek devices had any point whatsoever. I said it at the time, and I’ll say it now: the Peek is pointless, because every smartphone out there (say, for example, the Samsung Galaxy Nexus on Android, or the iPhone 4S, or if you need your phone for email, the Blackberry Bold 9900) can do what you do, for free, but you can’t do what they do. In a world where mobile phones exist, the Peek is, and always was, pointless.

And now it’s dead. It’s just a shame that they had to shaft their customer base in the process; I’m sure this was covered in the terms and conditions, which means they’ve categorically not done anything legally wrong, as far as I can see… but just because it’s legal, it doesn’t mean it’s right, does it?

So yeah. Fun times, eh?

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Okay, here we go, another proclamation about technology, by Pope Benedict XVI, or as a certain circle of my friends calls him, Emperor Popeatine (or Darth Ratzinger, either’s good). Granted, this is only tangentially related to phones, but since he was having a pop at social media, and since social media thingies are a massive part of the modern mobile experience, I thought what the hell, and decided to blog about it anyway.

So, what’s the Pontiff been saying? Well, according to Yahoo News, he’s come out and said that he doesn’t think people should use the likes of Twitter and Facebook so much, and that people need to strike a balance between silence, words, images and sounds…

Annoyingly, part of me agrees with him (and if you want to know why that annoys me, check out Tim Minchin’s “Pope Song“, but be prepared for, ooh, a lot of swearing), although specifically, I think that other people should learn how to use silence, instead of tweeting that they’ve just eaten toast. At no point in my life, ever, have I even come close to needing to know that. Ever. At all. Stop it.

No, I didn’t just tell all my Twitter followers to shut up, because I don’t have any Twitter followers! Ha ha! Well, I don’t think so, anyway, I’ve not actually been on Twitter in about 3 years, to check.

Anyway…

However, if I’m going to not use the subject to make a joke, and if I’m going to actually write a serious response (I know, it’s rare, but I can do it, if I try really hard), then I’d have to say that his argument doesn’t convince me, and not just because he’s the Pope. What ye have to ask yourself is why things like Facebook (hell, we even have a few phones, notably the HTC ChaCha, dedicated to doing Facebook-type stuff) and Twitter are so popular, y’see.

Is it because they include subliminal programming to brainwash people into loving them, or because they tap into something humans want?

We are a naturally social species. We’ve taken social interaction to a level unprecedented anywhere else in the animal kingdom, and I’ve seen it argued that our social natures might be one of the key reasons why we evolved intelligence in the first place. We are, quite simply, social animals. We love to talk. We love to gab. We love to interact, and Twitter and its ilk tap into that. Yes, I agree that people should also interact with others in the real world, but you simply cannot vilify a piece of technology, because it gives people what they want, especially when you yourself are on Twitter.

So, you guys reading this… yes, you need to interact with others in the real world, yes, I agree with that, but you take your iPhone 4S or your Nokia Lumia 800, or whatever you use, and enjoy what it was made for: to let you fulfil your evolutionary imperative to interact with others.

But please, I implore you, please stop telling me when you’ve just eaten toast…

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Here we go, this is my burning question for the day, and it’s inspired by the first review I read for the Blackberry Porsche Design P’9981 (from Engadget), a phone that is, let’s not beat about the bush, a Blackberry Bold 9900 in posh knickers. It also costs, according to the latest info I’m seeing, just shy of 1500 quid. So, my question, really, is simple: what in the name of Godzilla are RIM thinking?

At a time when they’re taking a pummelling in the market, and when they’re trying to turn it around with a new CEO, did they really think a 1500 quid, limited run phone was the answer? Well apparently, it seems like they did, but as you can probably guess, I remain highly sceptical, although “highly sceptical” is a tame way of putting it…

Oh alright, I think that the chances of this thing turning the situation round, for the ailing maker of Blackberry phones, are hovering somewhere between zero and absolutely, utterly smurf all. It’s such a weird move to pull, as well; when the mass market is buying fewer and fewer of your phones, then apparently, the solution is to make a phone that the mass market will never buy at all.

It baffles me, it really does. It makes me worry for RIM’s long-term survival, too; what they needed, right now, was a mass market that blew everyone’s minds, one that took on the iPhone 4S at its own game, and won. What they needed was a phone running on the newest version of Blackberry OS, the one that’s not coming out till the end of the year, and that OS needs to have had a complete overhaul.

Instead, we get a limited edition phone, which simply will not pull in much profit for them. It can’t, basically; even if they sell well, it’s still only available in limited quantities, so it’s bound to make less money than a wildly popular mass market phone would.

So, naturally, RIM decided to go for the limited edition (emphasis on the limited, in my opinion) phone. Such is the way of life at RIM, it seems. I wouldn’t mind, only it’s just that I’m starting to see why they’re failing.

‘Tis all very sad, really.

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Awesome, here we go, I’ve been dying to blog about this for ages, but with it not relating to mobile phones, I couldn’t. You may have heard of a bill going through the US political system, called SOPA (along with a sister bill, PIPA). If you’re in the video gaming community, I’m certain you’ve heard about it, ‘cos it’s set the internet aflame, it really has.

Well, now, brilliantly, I can wade into the debate, ‘cos according to PocketNow, a new Android app has come out, that allows you to fight SOPA through your mobile phone. Well, okay, it lets you fight the companies who support SOPA, but you’re still fighting the bill, indirectly, right? I suppose that with it being an American bill, I’d also best explain why us Brits should care about this…

Y’see, SOPA stands for “Stop Online Piracy Act”, and while that is a noble goal (with pirates generally being, y’know, thieving scumbags), SOPA, as written, is an utterly bad idea. Basically, it makes things like, say, doing a live stream of a game a criminal act, opening people up to jail time, and massive fines; it is, effectively, corporate censorship of the internet, and would serve to utterly devastate the internet we have come to know and love.

Don’t believe me? Consider a couple of quotes, then. Google’s director of public policy, Bob Boorstin said that if the law was passed, “YouTube would just go dark immediately. It couldn’t function.”

Yeah, when even the big names like Google and Microsoft (the latter of which stands to lose a lot from software piracy) say an anti-piracy bill is bad, you know something’s up, right? And it will affect us, over here, because although the bill only covers the USA, where are most sites like Facebook or Google hosted?

For a better understanding, I recommend watching this video by TotalBiscuit:

Pretty shocking, innit? Put simply, if the bill passes, the best case scenario is that it’ll be bad. The worst case scenario is that the internet as we know it will cease to exist. So, that’s why the protests have begun in earnest (with the one against hosting company GoDaddy even forcing them to withdraw support for SOPA, so big win, there), and you can join in, no matter what country you’re in, with the Boycott SOPA app, for Android phones like the HTC Sensation XE or the Samsung Galaxy Nexus.

The way it works is simple, and it’s designed to hit the companies supporting SOPA where it hurts: in their bank balances. Basically, it allows you to scan barcodes, and figure out whether it’s a product made or sold by someone who supports SOPA; that way, you can put it back on the shelf, and buy a rival’s product, and then maybe, just maybe, the corporate bigwigs will get the idea that we will not support what they’re doing.

So, fight the good fight, that’s what I say. The big corporations need to be reminded that governments are there to serve us, not them. Because this isn’t about piracy. This is about the future of the internet.

And we will not give up fighting for what we love…

[Image credit: Mozilla]

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Woohoo

Yes, these are the new year’s resolutions I wish people in the industry would make, ‘cos I can’t help but think that the world would be a better place if these came to pass. Basically, it’s a good job my new year’s resolution wasn’t to stop being arrogant, or I’d have just failed. So, let’s begin…

First off, it’d be quite nice if Apple (or Nokia, or Samsung, or everyone else, come to that) stopped suing everyone and their dogs. Given that patent lawsuits were the thing that most made my blood boil in 2011, I would love it, utterly love it, if mobile manufacturers made a new year’s resolution to stop trying to ruin their rivals’ year by suing ‘em. Could we all try competing on innovation, just for novelty value, please?

Next up, it’d be quite nice if RIM made a new year’s resolution to stop faffing about and update their range of Blackberry phones. Like, properly update them, because they’re haemorrhaging market share at a rate of knots. A new phone running on their new OS? Brilliant. It won’t arrive till the end of 2012? Useless. RIM, if you want to get yourselves out of the mobile market, that’s the way to do it!

Next: I wish people would stop trying to market their phones by slagging off the competition. And yes, by “people”, I mean Apple, who seem to think that the best way to market their stuff (or to get out of dealing with Antennagate) is to have a pop at other manufacturers, like HTC.

It strikes me as being unprofessional, but maybe my mam and dad just raised me properly?

I’m sure there’s other things I’ve forgotten, but those are the big ones I’d like to see happen in 2012. They won’t happen, of course. This blog post may well be an exercise in futility, but hey, we can dream, can’t we?

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Well, Christmas is well and truly over, and my supplies of good will and peace to all men have dried up, so it’s time for another rant! But hey, I’m being topical, ‘cos it is about Christmas. Well, to be fair, it’s mainly about annoying little sprogs with epic levels of self-entitlement, but there’s a general Christmassy theme to it. And a phone-esque theme, too.

Y’see, I read a story on IntoMobile, which eeeeeeeeeeeeever so slightly annoyed me. Apparently, lots of kids were expecting iPhones for Christmas, and their parents didn’t buy them one, so they’re basically disowning their parents, via Twitter.

And that, my friends, is the very definition of “first world problems”, ain’t it?

As much as I’m tempted to say this is archetypal iPhone user behaviour (and given my form, you know how tempted I am to say that, but I’ll resist), but I don’t think that’s necessarily the right answer. Y’see, I’ve seen these epic levels of entitlement, before, and it ain’t limited to people who’ve got the iPhone 4S, for example. Trust me, take a look on an average video game forums, you’ll find levels of self-absorption that’d even make these iPhone-bereft younglings stop and think.

Although, having said that… have you seen some of the Tweets these snot-nosed little brats have been coming out with? Seriously, there’s someone on there complaining about the fact they didn’t get an iPad 2. Why is that a big deal? Her parents bought her a new car.

Wow. Just wow…

And that’s another thing, right: I can’t help thinking that there’s something wrong in the world, when 12 year old kids are asking, nae demanding, to get what amounts to a 500 quid phone. Seriously? In my day (I thought I’d best say that, since I’m aware of how old I sound, right here), when I was your age, I got books, and I was bleedin’ grateful, too. Ungrateful little yuppie larvae, ye don’t even know ye’re born! I want an HTC Sensation XE, but do you see me mithering if my parents don’t buy me it, especially when they bought me four Xbox games (side note: praise the hosts of heaven, for pre-owned games)?

No, you chuffing well don’t. And no, it’s not because I don’t trust them to buy the right phone. Well, not entirely, anyway…

So, yes. Not only would I not buy my kids an iPhone 4S, but if they disowned me on Twitter, I’d take their current phone (which would be the oldest, cheapest, nastiest Nokia you can imagine, by the way) off them. And then I’d troll them on Twitter, knowing they couldn’t answer back, what with me having their phone, ‘cos that’s the kind of parent I’d be.

Anyway, basically, if children are the hope of the future, I suspect the future may be in a lot of trouble…

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It’s been a long time since I had a good, snarling monster of a rant, so with this being the season of good will, I reckon it’s time I had one, right now, so I might be able to actually feel some good will. Y’know, lest me bottling it up, in conjunction with the absurdity of the thing that’s annoyed me, makes me try to headbutt a wall to death (which would, admittedly, be quite funny, for everyone except me… hmmmm, maybe I’ll headbutt a bouncy castle, instead). So, what’s got on my nerves, this time?

Patent lawsuits, that’s what. I’ve done a few bijou rantettes about patent lawsuits before, but we’ve now reached the point where steam comes out of my ears, so it’s time to give the topic of patent lawsuits a right royal thundering…

So, what’s brought this to a head, you might ask. Well, I’ll tell ya; it’s actually two lawsuits, one by Apple against HTC, and the other one against Google by, of all people, British Telecom. So, let’s start with the HTC one, since that one has already reached a resolution, more or less. Basically, the ITC put a ban on HTC products being sold in the USA (to come into force next April), unless they changed the problem bit of their phones, and HTC issued a statement saying, more or less, “Yup, that’s fine, doing it as we speak, old bean.”

But what was the patent in question? Well, what it amounts to was “being able to tap on something like a phone number in an email, and have the phone do something with it, like dial it”. Yeah. That’s the level of absurdity we’re talking, here, but let’s face it, this is nothing new for Apple, a company noted by oh so many people as being patent trolls extraordinaire! What do you expect from the company who had the gall to say how other manufacturers are allowed to design their own phones…?

Or, come to that, the company who more or less say they invented video calling after Three had been offering it for six years…

However, the BT one strikes me as even more absurd, since the patents in that lawsuit all seem to concern location-based services, and one of them basically attempts to say that Google can’t do sat-nav software. Another one as good as says that Google aren’t allowed to offer location-based services, like finding your local cinema through your HTC Sensation XE, f’r'instance.

Yes, I wondered what the hell BT has to do with mapping services, as well. One also has to wonder why they’re not trying to sue Apple or Microsoft, whose services both offer the same exact damn thing. Maybe they’ve seen other people trying to kick Google, and thought they’d get in on the act, too. I can’t say I’m totally surprised, though, ‘cos remember that BT were the people associated with Phorm, and you all know my opinion on that little debacle.

Now, let’s be honest, here; when even the EU comes out and says that patent lawsuits are stifling innovation, you have to wonder whether there might be something in that theory. I’d go one step further, though, ‘cos I’d say that’s precisely what the people instigating the lawsuits want. A friend memorably said to me that Apple’s continual firing off of these things feels like the barking of a wounded dog, and that made some sense to me.

Hey, if you can’t beat ‘em on innovation, then make sure customers can’t ever buy your rival’s products, right?

So, who do I blame for this shockingly awful state of affairs? Do I blame the company who many have said to be patent trolls par excellence, Apple? Well, no, actually, or at least, not completely. They’re simply taking advantage of a flawed and broken system to get their way. It seems like a dirty tactic to me, but business is war, after all. No sirree, the entity I blame is the US Patent & Trademark Office, for promulgating a system that’s utterly, hopelessly cream-crackered.

I blame the utterly broken system, that positively encourages companies to be underhanded, slimy, little bleeders. It needs reforming, plain and simple. Imagine a world with a patent system that actually worked; no lawsuits, miles and miles of store shelves filled with glittering, gleaming phones more advanced than anything we can even currently imagine, a new renaissance in communications technology…

My god, it’ll be beautiful…

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I’ve whinged about Apple a lot, while I’ve been working on this blog; it’s sort of a running theme, in any post I do about the Cupertino giant, that I really, really can’t stand them. From their draconian App Store policies, to their sheer, unfettered arrogance, to their belief that they invented everything, even if other phones were doing those exact same things for years… basically, pretty much everything Apple does annoys me.

I keep trying to tell myself it’s some psychological problem in my head, and that I should let it go, but they keep doing things that just boggle my mind. Case in point: this latest story, as reported on by The Verge), which has absolutely, completely staggered me…

That source link went with the headline “Apple gives Samsung some work-around options for its iPhone and iPad design patents“, but I don’t reckon that does this story justice. After reading the meat of the story, I reckon “Apple honestly believes that every modern phone ever ripped off their design“. Y’see, what the company’s done, as part of the ongoing lawsuit between them and Samsung (because they’re convinced phones like the Samsung Galaxy S II ripped off the design of the iPhone, specifically the more rectangular design currently used for the iPhone 4S), is give Samsung a list of design solutions that won’t infringe on Apple’s design patents.

That’s arrogant enough, but then you read the suggestions, and the whole thing goes from arrogance to lunacy. Here, see for yourself:

• Front surface that isn’t black.
• Overall shape that isn’t rectangular, or doesn’t have rounded corners.
• Display screens that aren’t centered on the front face and have substantial lateral borders.
• Non-horizontal speaker slots.
• Front surfaces with substantial adornment.

They really think that only they have the right to make rectangular phones, or phones with the screen in the middle? Are they on glue?

Standard Apple behaviour, really, isn’t it? Come up with a feature, that’s been seen on many mobile phones previously, and then make out they invented it. First there was photo messaging, then there was video calling, and now there’s rectangular phones. Basically, what they want other people to be making is the ol’ Del-Boy phone, or at least, it seems that way to me.

Only it can’t have a black front. Or have the screen in the middle.

There’s a word that seems massively appropriate, here: hubris. That’s defined as “excessive pride or self-confidence; arrogance”, and if any word sums up Apple, that’s the one. There’s another point here, though, and it’s one that was put into words by a mate I was talking to about this story, earlier; they said that Apple’s actions in this seem like the barking of a wounded dog.

Could it be possible that all those phones using Android have Apple more scared than they’ll let on, and thus, that Apple have decided to try and stop competition they know they can’t beat?

I honestly don’t know, but as theories go, it’s a compelling one, eh?

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Hmm, y’know what, I think I’d better label this blog post as a rant, right now, before I even get into the meat of writing it. Y’know, ‘cos it’s about WebOS, and thus it’s about HP, and my opinion of HP is… well, let’s be polite, and say that my opinion of HP is not particularly favourable. It’d be churlish (although not inaccurate) to say that I think HP couldn’t find their posteriors with both hands and a very big atlas, so I won’t. So, what’s fuelled my ire today, then?

Simple. According to French newspaper Le Figaro (Google-translated link, have fun), HP will be making a decision about the fate of WebOS within the next fortnight. Alas, given the complete lack of faith I have in HP, I fear that decision will inevitably end up as being “screw it up royally“…

It’s distressing, it really is. When it was first released, I fell in love with WebOS, ‘cos damn, I’d never seen a phone platform with so much potential for greatness. It was all just so intuitive, I felt sure it would take off in a big way. And I still maintain it would have done, if Palm hadn’t made a complete dog’s dinner of the hardware (which was, in hindsight, now that my rose-tinted specs are off, rubbish) in that first phone to use the platform, the Palm Pre. And then my heart sank when HP bought Palm, because it’s my honest and sincere opinion that HP are useless.

After this whole debacle with WebOS, it’s fair to say that my opinion of them hasn’t changed. So, they’ll be coming to a decision about WebOS within the next two weeks will they? The words of HP’s Meg Whitman do make it sound like they plan on binning the platform. She says: “We should announce our decision in the next two weeks. This is not an easy decision, because we have a team of 600 people which is in limbo. We need to have another operating system.”

In that case, I’m hoping for two things: one, I hope that WebOS has a future; and two, I hope that future isn’t with HP…

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, I still reckon the best thing would be if somebody else, a manufacturer who’s halfway competent, bought the platform. Samsung have already said they’ll do no such thing, but hey, there’s always HTC, who have said they’re open to the idea.

I guess we’ll know more within the next fortnight, eh?

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Well, that made my blood boil a lot more than I expected it to! This post wasn’t going to be a rant, but after hearing what Nokia had to say (in an unbearably smug tone) in the video, I was annoyed enough to make it into a rant. So, here goes…

You know what really wound me up, to no end? The fact they’re saying this is a new, revolutionary design, and they’ve put all this thought into it, blah di blah di blah. And that’s all well and good, but… oh wait, no, hang on, it’s not, is it, because they copy-pasted the design from the Nokia N9. At this point, it honestly feels like they’re trying to pretend the Nokia N9 (and by extension MeeGo itself) never happened. And that grinds my gears, like you wouldn’t believe.

Granted, the Lumia 800 looks gorgeous, but at no point in that making of video do they say, “Yeah, we already has this awesome design from the frankly fantastic Nokia N9, and it worked really well with Windows Phone, so we used that.”

Yes, I got angry when the Nokia bloke said it too courage to design something new, because, ahem, NOKIA N9, YOU HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING NEW IN THIS PHONE. All part of Nokia’s long term plan to dump all over the N9, I suppose. And oh my, the smugness on display! I’m no’ kiddin’, they’re almost smug enough to work for Apple!

So, in conclusion, a phone that looks gorgeous, but runs an OS I don’t like as much as Android (although objectively, it is still pretty damn good). And Nokia’s shocking smugness makes my skin crawl.

All in all, I think we now know why we’ve never seen a ‘Making Of’ for a phone before…

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