So, what can we expect? Will mobile phones become powerful enough to take over the world, bringing about the apocalypse? Or will someone fiddle about with their copy of the Large Hadron Collider app, and cause a massive feedback loop, thus tearing the universe a new spacehole? Or is it more likely that the London Olympics will be so cringeworthy that every Brit will simply wish the world’d end? Let’s find out!

Right, first prediction, and let’s go with an obvious one: quad-core phones will happen. That’s not so much a prediction as a simple statement of fact, ‘cos it’s well known that unless something goes very badly wrong, that is going to happen. I tell ya, it ain’t half going to be fun seeing phones that make even monsters like the HTC Sensation XE look a bit slow.

On the subject of Android smartphones, the nest bleedin’ obvious prediction is that Ice Cream Sandwich is going to hit the mainstream in a big, big way. We’ve seen the first glimpses of what it’s capable of, in the Samsung Galaxy Nexus, so next year, we’re going to see what that bad boy can really do. And I’ll tell ya one of the phones we’ll likely see it in, too: the Samsung Galaxy S III, the next-gen follow-up to the Samsung Galaxy S II.

Oh, and expect to see a replacement for the iPhone 4S, too, while we’re on the subject of newer versions of existing phones.

In terms of things only tangentially linked to mobile phones, Mass Effect 3 is coming out in March, and there’s apparently going to be a mobile app to go along with it. So, expect me to do a blog post that’s about the mobile app, whilst really being about Mass Effect 3, ‘cos that’s kinda my thing. As for other things that’ll be big, or that’ll make a comeback, in 2012, my crystal ball is saying NFC (maybe), Alcatel and annoyingly, The Bay City Rollers. It also predicts I will spend most of the year in a state of low level annoyance, and that I will continue to be an irascible old git.

I think my crystal ball might need recalibrating, except in terms of me being annoyed, it’s bang on, there…

And then, after all that, we’ll begin the countdown to end of existence as we know it, scheduled to happen on December 21st, 2012. Yep, that’s the date the Mayans allegedly predicted for the end of the world (even though they didn’t, really), so assuming that happens (I’m not sure, but I think it involves mutating latinos), this will be the last “predictions for the coming year” post that I ever do.

However, since I assume the hippies and conspiracy theorists are deluding themselves, expect another one of these predictions posts next year…

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And ye never know, some of them might even be sensible!

However, don’t expect them to all be sensible; you’ll be disappointed, especially by the last two. If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, that should come as absolutely no surprise to you. So, anyway, let’s begin with…

Best operating system of 2011

I’m not going to beat about the bush, here, ‘cos you know that I’m going to say Android, right? Well, what else could I do? I’m not a big fan of Windows Phone (complete lack of true widgets to customise) and I actively dislike iOS (same problem, plus it’s made by Apple), so what choice did I have?

Of course, it helps that the guy who designed WebOS is now in charge of Android’s design, which means it’s now as gorgeous as it is functional. So, therefore, Android wins, ‘cos I like everything else less.

Biggest letdown of 2011

Right, I’m going to have to say that it’s the Nokia Lumia 800, but bear in mind that this one is merely my own personal choice. It does not mean that the phone is bad (because it’s not, it’s really nice), it was just a disappointment to me. Why?

Well, thanks to their new number-based phone naming scheme, we all know that a “9xx” series phone is better than an “8xx” series phone. I was disappointed, because what I wanted to see was the Nokia Lumia 900…

Best mobile app of 2011

Now then, this one was a toughie, what with there being a Large Hadron Collider app available on Android, but in the end, there was only one app I could go with as the best (or in this case, maybe I should say most important app of the year): OnLive.

Basically, it allows you to play pretty much any game on your mobile phone, not just mobile games. So, instead of being stuck with Angry Birds, you could play, for example, Assassins Creed Revelations. Or DiRT 3. I simply cannot ignore that!

Biggest shock of 2011

This one was an easy one to decide, as there is one story that immediately stood out as being the most shocking one, in 2011: the untimely death of Apple CEO, Steve Jobs.

Love him or hate him, no-one can deny that the man had a huge effect on the tech world, in general, and the mobile industry, in particular. Without phones like the current-gen iPhone 4S and its predecessors, and without Steve Jobs, the mobile world could look very different.

Best manufacturer of 2011

Now this one is a toughie, ‘cos I’m having real trouble deciding who the best manufacturer of the year is. I know who my favourite is (it’s HTC, same as every year), but that doesn’t necessarily make them the best.

Y’know what? I think I’m going to have to go with an unexpected, and somewhat unorthodox choice. It’s also a choice I never thought I’d make, because it’s Alcatel. The reason’s simple: they went from making godawful phones, to really surprisingly good phones. Thus, they win.

Most blood-boiling annoyance of 2011

Let’s not beat about the bush, it’s patent lawsuits. They stifle innovation, they make everyone involved look like children, they make lawyers rich, and they’re an utter pig to find appropriate images for. So I’m not going to bother. Blech. I spit on them!

Best phone of 2011

Here we go, it’s the big one! Which phone am I going to pick as the best one of the year? The suspense is almost palpable, right? Or, at least, it would be, if the image to the right didn’t give away the fact that I’ve gone for the Samsung Galaxy S II.

Put simply, the Galaxy S II is one of the most popular Android phones ever. I’d argue that it’s done more to make Android popular than any other phone before it, so for that reason, the Samsung Galaxy S II is my phone of the year.

Most tenuous link betwixt blog post and phones of 2011

Yay, my favourite category! You may well have noticed that sometimes, just sometimes (usually in the Famous Phones section), there’s a really tenuous link between the topic I’m talking about, and the actual topic of mobile phones. It’s a shame that this isn’t 2010, or I’d pick my Assassins Creed Brotherhood post, a masterpiece of “barely talking about the thing I’m supposed to be talking about”.

However, since this is 2011, I’m going to have to go with the Deus Ex: Human Revolution post that I did, ‘cos that game had no modern mobile phones in it. But I still managed to make a link, so I could talk about it, ‘cos that’s how I roll.

Most pointless award in the 2011 MobileShop round-up of 2011

That last one. Or this one. Could go either way, frankly…

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Er, blimey, that is big, if it’s true! However, there’s one thing I should point out, right off the bat. Engadget has a report on various companies’ official statements on the matter, and one thing immediately stood out to me.

It seems be the case that if you live over here in Blighty, or anywhere apart from America, come to that, then the answer to the question in the title is no, you’re not being snooped on. Which is a good thing…

There’s a variety of official statements from various manufacturers, platform developers, and networks, including HTC, Microsoft, Google, Samsung, Apple, and so on, and the consensus seems to be that CarrierIQ is a requirement of some American networks, not networks over here. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be aware of the situation, but both HTC and Samsung have said they only install it when asked to do so by networks in the USA. Sony Ericsson have also confirmed the same thing.

So, it seems to be network-specific, and at least one UK network (T Mobile, to be exact) has said they do not use CarrierIQ, which, again, is a good thing.

It seems that CarrierIQ is used by networks to track diagnostic information on the phone, but that fact that it’s included without being disclosed, and the fact that there’s apparently no option to stop it being there, has upset a lot of people. It’s easy to see why, too, when you see this video, which purportedly shows it logging keystrokes and the user’s text messages.

The problem is that there’s no real confirmation of what it is that CarrierIQ actually logs, and the privacy implications there are kinda scary. It’s much the same, as far as I can tell, as EA’s Origin end user policy, which gives them the right to go through your entire computers contents, and ping back whatever it likes to the mothership. The point is not whether it will do that, but whether it can, and that’s sort of the point about why people are so up in arms about CarrierIQ, really.

This story is ongoing, so I’ll keep you informed as there are more developments…

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That’s a shock to say the least, and although it happens to everyone in the end, 56 really is no age at all. So above all else, my condolences go out to his family.

While this is a big loss to the industry (and despite my well known opinion of Apple, I can’t deny that’s true), it’s a bigger loss to them, and so, our deepest condolences go out to the Jobs family.

It may seem strange for me to say that the loss of Steve Jobs is a big loss to the industry, after my well-known tirades against Apple, but I still maintain that although I feel the iPhone is not a good phone, the effect it had on the mobile industry was electric. It gave other manufacturers, the likes of HTC and Samsung, a very big kick up the backside, and although there were touchscreen phones before the iPhone, Apple’s baby, the brainchild of Steve Jobs, popularised them like no other device.

By simply existing, Steve Jobs gave the likes of Google something to compete against; it’s no secret that without the iPhone, Android most likely wouldn’t exist in its current form. Thus, while I don’t think the iPhone was or is a good phone, I can’t deny it was an important phone.

Love him or hate him, Steve Jobs was an important figure in this industry, if for nothing else than the famous Reality Distortion Field that made people want Apple gear so badly (and, of course, the fact that Pixar exists, as is, because of him), and it will be interesting to see just how the mobile world evolves without him in it. Some people predict problems for Apple, as in a very real sense Steve Jobs was Apple, but that’s a conversation for another day.

For now, though, as I said, our condolences go out to his family and friends, who have lost far more than we in the industry have.

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Every now and then, a story comes along that is so mind-blowingly big, that you just know everyone reading will have already heard about it. Given that this is easily the biggest news in the country for weeks, and given that mobile phones are involved, I can’t not talk about it. Let’s not beat about the bush, you all know I’m talking about the riots that have turned parts of London into a warzone, and that have spilled over across the entire country, in some of the most sickening displays of violence I’ve ever seen in this country.

From the point of view of this blog, there’s a legitimate reason for me to be discussing it, as mentioned by the BBC: what part have mobile phones played in the ongoing civil insurrection?

There’s been talk of the rioters (or SFAs, as I have taking to calling them… SFA of course standing for Scumbag F*****g Animals) organising things via Twitter, Facebook and the BBM service on Blackberry phones, and I don’t doubt for one second that has happened, even if it’s just SFAs showing off their latest haul. But that doesn’t mean technology is to blame, as some people have been suggesting. No, I tend to support a different idea.

There’s also been talk of how the SFAs are “disaffected youths”, and while I agree that’s true, that doesn’t get to the heart of it, for me. Nor is it a race thing; the SFA horde is made of young people from all creeds, and both genders. None of those explain the sickening displays of violence we’ve seen over the last four days, with the rioters smashing and grabbing what they can, and burning the rest. Like everyone else, I watched the news reports of Reeves Corner in Croydon being destroyed, and what really rammed it home to me is that I know people near Croydon, and in Liverpool and London themselves.

No, this isn’t some peaceful protest, out to make a point. This is a pack of animals, out for anything they can get, to break and destroy. This is scumbags who want the shinies without earning any coin to pay for the shinies, and playing the victim, because they’re an oppressed mass. I heard the interviews on the BBC; they may be disaffected, and they may come from deprived areas or upbringings, but they aren’t interested in bettering themselves. They want no part of civilisation; they want to destroy, to ruin lives, to bring everyone else down to their chidlish, pathetic level, and while they’re at it, they want the newest, blingest phones, consoles and TVs without giving anything back.

They are, in short, scum.

That’s why it’s a good job, for them, that I’m not running the country, because after seeing the scenes on the news, and talking to my friends who live near those areas (which now look like warzones), my first response would be to drive them into the sea.

So, no. Technology is not to blame, and in fact, technology is going to allow me to end this blog post, after all the hate (and it is hate, I loathe the SFAs doing this, regardless of where they come from, or who they are… the second you stop caring about people’s lives is the second that I propose you should be driven into the sea) I’ve just spewed.

Y’see, Twitter and Facebook are responsible for our first rays of hope in this crisis, where people have organised clean-up campaigns. Real people, like Charles Jupiter, on the streets, saying, “Not in my city.”

Britain will get through this. We will ride this storm, we will come out the other side, and we will rebuild what the animals smash. We will never give up, and we will do ourselves proud.

Mark my words.

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The whole story about the News of the World hiring private investigators to hack into people’s phones has been news for absolutely ages, so you may be wondering why I’m commenting on it, now. Well, if you’ve been watching the news, you know why; the whole thing has come to a head this week, in a huge way, culminating in the News of the World closing its doors and shutting up shop.

But before that, more information came out, and it was this information that prompted me to blog about it, as it made me more angry than I’ve been in a good long time. So, I’m putting this post in both ‘Editorial Opinions’ and ‘Rants’; the first because that was it is, and the second because I can almost guarantee that’s what it will end up as…

And yes, I included that disclaimer at the beginning, for a specific reason. Not only that, but I am once again thankful that opinions are allowed, because it is my honest and sincere opinion that anyone involved in hacking phones for the News of the World, and anyone who sanctioned or approved of the News of the World hacking phones, is unmitigated, irredeemable, immoral scum.

It shows an odd disparity with my reaction when they were hacking celebrities’ phones, because at that time, I sort of didn’t really care. I thought, “Celebrities, blah, what do they have to worry about?”

I realise now that I was wrong. They’re human beings too, with the same basic rights as all of us, but what finally hammered it home that the people doing the hacking are utter scum, was the fact that there have been allegations of them hacking not only the phones of celebrities, but also those of victims of the 7/7 attacks, the families of deceased British soldiers, and the phone of murder victim Milly Dowler.Not only that, but it’s alleged that they deleted voicemails from Dowler’s phone, giving false hope to her parents, and seriously hampering the investigation to find her killer.

I’m angry enough to (to borrow a phrase from a Discworld novel) spit lacework into steel, so I’ll choose my words very carefully, and simply say: if true (as they are currently allegations, not proven crimes), that is sickeningly unacceptable and completely inhuman.

So, I’m incredibly glad that the newspaper has closed down, and that, according to The Guardian, former NOTW editor Andy Coulson has been arrested on charges of “conspiring to intercept communications and corruption”. I can’t see how he couldn’t have known about this, and if that is the case (again, not proven in court, merely allegations), he either approved it or didn’t stop it. Either option is as bad. He has been released on bail, pending the trial in October, but whether he is innocent or guilty (I don’t know either way, and make no claims as to which he is), this whole sordid, nasty business needs to be dragged out into the light.

So yes. I’m almost angry enough to bite chunks out of my desk, and I sincerely hope heads roll over what’s being called “Britain’s Watergate”. We, the British public, deserve so much better than this.

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And now there’s another reason for me to support the EU. According to IntoMobile, the EU is planning to abolish international roaming charges, for voice calls within the EU itself, by 2015.

Thus, the plan is to make sure that any calls made within any EU country will cost precisely the same as a voice call made from your home country, without any extra roaming charges. And that is an unambiguously good thing. Say you’re a Brit abroad, with your mobile phone (doesn’t matter what network, be it Orange, Vodafone, O2, or whatever, ‘cos they’d all be obliged to follow the rules). Maybe you’re on holiday in Ibiza, since us Brits seem to like Ibiza.

The point is, calling someone would cost you exactly the same there, as it would at home.

And frankly, even if the stories made up in The Sun, designed to build up nationalistic pride against Europe, were true… well, with directives like this, and the enormous comfort that is the European Court of Human Rights, I’d take straighter cucumbers any day.

Thus, anyone who says the EU is a bad thing has their head firmly wedged up their bottom, and should go away…

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MeeGo.

Y’see, I read a post on IntoMobile earlier, reporting from the MeeGo Conference in San Francisco, where Intel were talking all about their big plans for the new OS, and basically pitching it to developers, manufacturers and consumers. And that’s brilliant, like, but the big question in my mind is this: in a world where Android, iOS and WP7 are king, has MeeGo got the chops to survive?

Well, that’s where things get a little muddy, and I say that as someone who really wants to see MeeGo succeed (and not just because it almost shares a name with something out of a H.P. Lovecraft story). Sure, it’s clear that Intel are going to be pushing MeeGo in a big way, but it’s going to be hard to argue that Nokia leaving them in the lurch (to go with Windows Phone 7) isn’t a huge blow.

However, that might not be such a problem if somebody like LG (or even ZTE, as IntoMobile points out), takes the job of making MeeGo phones to heart. But even then, there’s a problem…

As much as I want MeeGo to succeed, my cynical side is saying that it’s not going to happen. Granted, the only version of MeeGo we’ve seen so far has been a not very well optimised alpha version, and the final product could (and likely will) be much, much better, but the fact is that it’s going to up against some serious heavyweights, most notably Android, who already have a serious lead in the market. My fear is that Intel just won’t be able to keep up.

I really, really hope I’m wrong, but I fear MeeGo may not make the grade…

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That ain’t all; according to The Guardian, they’ve also unveiled a scheme that will allow people to pay their cab fares by text message. So, if you’re stuck without any small change when you need a cab, you just text the taxi’s licence number to a central code, and the charge for the trip goes on your monthly bill. Or, presumably, comes out of your PAYG balance, if you’re not on contract…

And that, I would contend, is a brilliant idea. For starters, if that scheme had existed when that Middlesbrough youth, that I blogged about, had his iPhone 4 (given the value, it sounded like an iPhone 4) nicked by a cabbie, he could’ve just texted the code to pay the fare, and not left his phone on the dashboard.

But anyway, I reckon this is one of the most brilliantest new schemes I’ve seen in a good long while. And best of all, because it works via text message and not NFC, it should theoretically mean that any Vodafone handset, whether it’s a brand new Sony Ericsson Xperia Arc or a 7 year old Nokia 1100, will be able to do it.

So, all in all, a scheme with zero drawbacks!

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Hmm

Anyway, the situation is this, according to The Register: after threatening RIM directly (then backing down, eventually), saying they’d ban Blackberry services because they couldn’t spy on everyone’s email, networks in the UAE are being told to block access to Blackberry Enterprise Servers, until they can, you guessed it, spy on everyone’s email.

Except this time, the blocking of BES only applies to consumers and small businesses, while big businesses, it seems, are being let off scot-free. Basically, then, it means that using Blackberry phones in the UAE is being rendered pointless, because the very thing that they are best at is being blocked from working. Well, if you’re an individual or work for a small business, which must make you a criminal or a terrorist, if you follow the logic of this decision…

Now, I’d like to make something very clear, here, in case there’s any ambiguity: I am not making a fuss about this just because it’s in the UAE. I’d be making just as much of a fuss if it was our government doing it. Not that they don’t already, of course. I simply hate the viewpoint of governments all round the world, who seem intent on criminalising every in whatever country they’re ostensibly running. It just makes me more inclined to believe that governments round the world never, ever do what is in the interests of their people, instead doing only what is in their own best interests. Especially when the argument is as tenuous as “if you own a Blackberry Torch, we can’t spy on you, so you’re a criminal and probably a terrorist, and you probably don’t put the right rubbish in the right bin, either, you scumbag”.

I also find it a teeny bit ironic that after the riots in Tunisia and Egypt, and the massive fracas in Libya, which were about freedom, and included things like free communications, the UAE and others (namely Saudi Arabia and India) decide that the best way to act, with those riots still firmly in the global memory, is to crack down on their people even more.

Fun!

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